1. Grab the book nearest you, turn to page 18 and find line 4. okay. i found it. now what am i supposed to do with it?
2. Stretch out your left arm as far as you can. What can you touch? the floor
3. What is the last thing you watched on TV? i don't pay attention to the tv unless there are dogs on it.
4. Without looking, guess what time it is. dinner time
5. Now look at the clock. What is the actual time? not dinner time 
6. With the exception of the computer, what can you hear? dogs barking, My People laughing, things outside that i should be barking at...
7. When did you last step outside? What were you doing? a couple of hours ago, and i was patroling the yard for those insurgents that climb trees.
8. Before you started this survey, what did you look at? my tail
9. What are you wearing? a yellow and black collar that says "missouri"
10. Did you dream last night? no.
11. When did you last laugh? i don't laugh, i'm too serious
12. What is on the walls of the room you are in? lots of smells
13. Seen anything weird lately? i saw a dog that walked right throughour nieghbor's yard (while the neighbors were in it) and didn't bark at them!!
14. What do you think of this quiz? .....
15. What is the last film you saw? the illusionist. very boring. no dogs. too much talking.
16. If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy? nothing. i can't eat or play with money
.17. Tell me something about you that I don’t know. i'm an antiaircraft barker.
18. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt and politics, what would you do? outlaw fences and leashes
19. Do you like to dance? i like to jump in the air and catch things
.20. George Bush: never met him
21. Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her? gwendolen
22. Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him? arviragus
23. Would you ever consider living abroad? yes, but the fence is in the way.
24. What do you want God to say to you when you reach the pearly gate? i'm a dog. i'm not going there. | 
